Step #7 to Recovering Your Authentic Child: Consistency

At our local support group last night, we discussed what our alienated children are going through, and thinking while they are rejecting us. It’s not what it seems, despite what the alienated child is saying and/or acting out. In her book “Breaking the Ties that Bind-Adult Children of Alienated Parents”, Amy Baker interviews adults who as children, were alienated from a parent. According to Dr. Baker, the alienated child feels rejected by you, the Targeted Parent- yes, you read that correctly-The Alienated Child feels rejected by the Targeted Parent. Why? They feel trapped and abandoned, despite their behavior. After all they are under extreme pressure from the Alienator. Because they feel abandoned and trapped, but cannot express their feelings, we must, as The Targeted Parent aka “The Chosen Parent” be consistent in our communication and love for our Alienated Child. Our consistency in giving love unconditionally will pay dividends in the future. We must utilize our patience here as well. By consistently showing love unconditionally, we will be dispelling the myths that have been created by the Alienators. We will be showing our child who we really are. In the end, we will be so grateful that we have!

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